On the Presentation

So this is what happened at the presentation the other day.

We arrived at the conference room only 10 minutes before the presentation. Dr. L called me and asked where were we only to hear me gasping for air. We didn't took the elevator but chose to climb 2 floors on the stairs as it is faster.

Dr. L came in a while later to tell us it's not a big problem we don't have projectors what so ever, we will only be presenting it to a few MOs anyways. And guess who? Prof T the head of the neurology division came in. We approached him before, but he rejected us because he was busy. I guess. Prof L from the cardio department did supervise another group, but just gave the instruction and let them do the elective on their own without any inspection. So I guess we are glad we came to Dr. L.

YL gave the presentation in the end. It's not a problem to any of us should they ask for the details as all of us are involved. That's what we thought. So the guys were picking the presentator the night before, but I was excluded anyhow, since I was there finishing up the report.

Prof. T stopped YL a lot to ask questions. "What is Jendrassik maneouvre?" "So you mean they're all hyper-reflxes?" "Now this is interesting, no reflexes in all? As in 100% absent?" "Back one slide, let me see the percentage. Can you tell me more about the figures?" "So how can you tell me that I can trust your results?" "30%? That's a lot. Are you sure?" But in the end, he just said "Alright, that's fine. Fine.."

We rounded up saying abnormal reflexes can be present in the normal population. But with the Jendrassik maneouvre, a greater grade of reflexes can be elicited.

But what excited us the most, he said it's a publishable material. And asked Dr. L to write it up, or rather, as how we see it, polish it and make it more of a journal material. It was a very subjective study. The whole reflex thing is very subjective, and our research made it scientific. He also said it was a good idea that we carried out this study to prove what everyone always believed in, so it's a really good study. And added a lot of "Good. Good."

It was a call for a lavish dining out. We have finally finished our elective study! I guess. Unless Dr. L called us back and asked us to do further study on the stroke patients.

If you read my other post before, I blogged about us taking the samples from the patients in the hospital. We've been lying yes. But Dr. L was the one who told us to write a report already, that what we've collected thus far is enough for our elective study.

It was funny to think though, that our initial title for our elective study was to find out the normal range of some vision thingy in the normal population through line bissection test. But after we came back from Cambodia, he suggested that we do the collection of data for reflexes as well. We spent one week or so doing a preliminary study, to get a grasps of what it is like tapping everyone with our tendon hammer. And after so much efforts put into the reflex test, Dr. L said we might as well just put aside our line bissection test and concentrate on our reflex test instead. Then again, our ultimate goal was to compare the reflexes in stroke patients to that of the normal population.

So... I also don't know.

But throughout the presentation, we saw a few lies. I don't know if Dr. L knows himself or he was just involved in our lies as well. See, the older adults sample above 40 that we collected in the hospital a few days ago, they were people from the community. They might be having mild cough or were present at the hospital for collection of their high blood pressure or high cholesterol medicine. We asked Dr. L back then about approaching people other than the medical staff, and he said it's fine as long as the people we approached does not have diabetes or neurological problem. BUT, during the presentation, he told Prof. T that our older adults are hospital staff! So... I find a huge pang of guilt for not clarifying. But if we do that, the whole study might not even be fine!

Anyhow... I guess it was still a call for relief. It's over finally. Phew... Anything else we do after this, we don't have to rush for a report or whatsoever. Hurrah

On tying the Knot

I love him to bits. Yes. I admit that. Whatever it is, I've spent a lot of time with him. And by a lot, I do mean A LOT. I practically have another world of mine with him. We spend the night until wee hours in the morning, yes, doing all those that you could ever imagined. We are young. So what do you expect? It's natural to be playful, no?

Okay fine, it's another forbidden relationship between a man and his gadget, that's if you consider him one.

I sent him to Low Yatt plaza yesterday. Went into the shop where I bought him in December 2006. I showed the technician my precious little darling. And he tried switching it on, but to no avail. He flipped him around, screwing in those little nuts while I watched him adjusting those helluva electronics. And he flipped him around, tried to wake him up again. It's still empty.

After much flipping and screwing, the technician finally got tired. It was an attempt of vain.

I drove the little Compaq to the HP headquarters in Bukit Damansara. And guess what, the receptionist said it'll most probably cost over 1k. I can see my darling in 2 weeks time, they just need to, take out the brain and replace it with a new one. He would never be the same. I need time to adjust to the new him. Omygawd, I feel so depressed.

Depression kicks in. No, not solely because of him, but rather the 1k I needed to spend to get him back again. I felt as if I'm using my pocket money like I'm Paris Hilton or the Sultan of B or whoever rich who spends without thinking twice. There's all those mega spendings this year. The Cambodia trip, the repair of my compact camera, the other trip I've made with someone new which no, I'm not going to tell who, and now this, the investment I'm making towards the forbidden relationship of a human and a gadget.

My saving account is running dry. I have no idea how am I supposed to spend the rest of my 3 months here, without asking for help from the parents. I don't want to. I think I'm on the verge of breaking down...

And I'm spending a lot of time in the car alone. Literally. Just last night, I drove to Dataran Merdeka, parked at the side, and watched the lights as the time passed by. No, I didn't do anything. I don't know what I can do without the much trusted legs.

I feel... helpless. And hopeless.

But I can't just tie the knot. I meant, the Malay proverb. Translated, it goes tying the stomach. Which means, abstinence from food. So no, I can't just tie the knot. I need my share of food still.

ps: Depressing sky by Barca Branca